Reporter: “You’ve got some scars on your face, Zlatan. What has happened?”

• “Well…I don’t know…you’ll have to ask your wife about that”

• “Arsene Wenger asked me to have a trial with Arsenal when I was 17. I turned it down. Zlatan doesn’t do auditions.”

After being asked by a female reporter about a photo of him and Gerard Pique hugging:

• “Come over to my house with your sister, baby, and I’ll show you who’s gay!”

What Zlatan bought his wife for her birthday:

• ”Nothing, she already has Zlatan.”

• "We are looking for an apartment (in Paris), if we do not find anything, then we will just buy a hotel."

How to shake off Stephane Henchoz:

• "First I went left, he did too. Then I went right, and he did too. Then I went left again, and he went to buy a hot dog.”

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